Ten Parent Pro-Tips: Hacks for Surviving With Littles

Happy Thursday, friends!

Y’all, I have been a parent for 1 year, 11 months, and 14 days. Sometimes it feels a lot longer than that, but in general, I’m a complete newbie. I am in absolutely no way a parenting expert, and I’m honestly not sure if anyone actually reaches that point. Sometimes I feel like I level up, but then teething happens and I’m killed and back to the first level (I’m envisioning Donkey Kong in this specific gaming metaphor).
TEN Parent Pro-Tips You NEED to Know!
With that said, there are definitely a few parental hacks I feel like I’ve figured out- some lessons I’ve learned the hard way that nobody told me before we decided to have kids. Some #protips, if you will. I’ve decided to share these parental hacks in case you haven’t experienced them yet, you don’t have kids yet, or just so you know you’re not alone!
TEN PARENT PRO-TIPS
  1. Do not pay for a gym membership. Your little people are your workout. Need to get some squats in? Don’t worry, you’ll get them done by reaching down to get whatever it is they drop on the floor and just. can’t. reach. Arm day? Picking up a 30 pound toddler all day is no joke. Gotta work those legs? Just bounce the crying infant who won’t sleep but won’t let you sit down- your quads will be screaming tomorrow!
  2. Just switch to iced coffee. Or learn to make a coffee smoothie. Just have no expectations of drinking hot coffee anymore.
  3. If your kid won’t eat, just get them out of the high chair, spend 10 minutes making your lunch, sit down to eat it, and voila! All of a sudden they are STARVING and just haaaave to have whatever it is you were hoping to eat.
  4. If you want to eat lunch during the week, make it on Sunday. Meal prep, people. It’s not just for the #healthy. It’s for the moms who want more than leftover crushed goldfish for lunch.
  5. Bribe your kids. Sometimes you just have to do it. This is generally how I get Oliver from the car to the house without him making a break for the road. “Oliver, if you go straight to the house you get Craisins!” (There is nothing that kid won’t do for some Craisins 👌.)
  6. Don’t plan on relaxing the first time you lay your child down at night. Expect to have to go in for another kiss, and then to pick up the teddy bear he threw over the side of the crib, then to reassure him you didn’t disappear just because he can’t see you anymore. After about 4-5 times of going in, you should be OK to try and relax. Maybe.
  7. Give up on privacy. Of all the things people tell you to expect when you have kids, absolutely NO ONE told me I would never go to the bathroom by myself again. I really would have liked a heads up on that one.
  8. If you’re coming up on a red light, be that person that starts coming to a stop veerrrryyy slooowwwllly about 50 yards from where you actually need to stop. Red lights are of the devil and somehow send babies (maybe just mine?) into a screaming, inconsolable mess.
  9. Do NOT make an agenda for the day. Kids know, and the second you have set plans for the day, they will find a way to interfere. “Oh, you wanted me to have a play date today, Mom? Well I’m going to wake up at 5 am this morning, need an early nap, sleep for 1 hour and just scream and whine the rest of the day so you’re just too exhausted and we don’t go!” I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what goes through their heads.
  10. If you want to eat something and not have to share it with a toddler, HIDE! I’ve eaten many a cookie and snuck lots of ice cream hiding beside our fridge where my toddler can’t see me. #sorrynotsorry

Being a parent is so fun! I am loving seeing my son grow up and become his own unique little person, and I can’t wait for my daughter’s little personality to develop and start coming through. But being a parent is also hard, so I am all about finding the little things that can make it a tad easier (until my toddler figures out my pro-tips and I’m back to square one).

TEN Parent Pro-Tips You NEED to Know!

If you’re looking for more tips on surviving parenthood, check out my 7 tips for surviving parenthood of two here!

What are some parent pro-tips that you’ve figured out? Please share in the comments!

Have a phenomenal day!

A Father's Day Tribute

44 Comments

  1. Samantha Carter

    June 22, 2017 at 7:00 am

    Oh my goodness, it’s like you’re in my head! These are all SO true – especially hiding when you eat a snack. I used to hide in the walk-pantry, but my four-year-old discovered me. Now, I just tell her whatever I’m eating is a “grown-up food” and not for kids. 😂

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 12:00 pm

      I’m going to have to switch to that tactic soon- my son has ears like a hawk, whenever I try to open or uncover ANYTHING he comes running to the kitchen! haha

  2. Emily @ Pizza & Pull-ups

    June 22, 2017 at 7:04 am

    This cracked me up, especially 2 & 3, I can serve my littles the exact thing I am eating, but somehow it tastes best from momma’s plate.

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 12:00 pm

      YES! I don’t understand! haha

  3. Corey | The Nostalgia Diaries

    June 22, 2017 at 7:29 am

    I had to laugh at the ‘no more hot coffee’ point… I can’t tell you how many times I reheated coffee when my daughter was a baby. I finally gave it up all together 🙂

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 12:01 pm

      It took me a while to figure out there’s really no point, I could spend all day reheating the same coffee! haha

  4. Becca

    June 22, 2017 at 8:03 am

    Two under two is no joke! I found number 3 to be a great way to lose the baby weight from baby 2 also. #UnexpectedBenefits Thanks for the very relatable laughs. 🙂

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 12:01 pm

      Oh man, I can’t even imagine with 3 right now! Super Mom!

  5. Rachel

    June 22, 2017 at 9:32 am

    Hahahahahahahahaha oh this is wonderful. Apparently I’m more pro than I thought because I’ve so done some of these!! I thought the hiding to eat a cookie was just me being ridiculous, but through your validation, I now know its because I’m a pro mommy! Thanks for sharing 😀

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 12:03 pm

      You are definitely not alone in the hiding your food department! Thanks for reading 🙂

  6. Amanda

    June 22, 2017 at 10:41 am

    Love this! It is sooooo true! I especially love the part about never getting to actually enjoy hot coffee, and how to get your kiddo to eat!

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 12:02 pm

      Yes, they’re the two every day things I can count on! Thanks for reading 🙂

  7. Mary Leigh

    June 22, 2017 at 2:07 pm

    So funny and accurate! I love the coffee one, but now I want to find a good coffee smoothie recipe!

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:37 pm

      I’ve been making this smoothie that has coffee, almond milk, a little chocolate syrup, a frozen banana, and ice- it’s amazing, and I throw some protein powder in there to have a caffeinated protein shake!

      1. Mary Leigh

        July 8, 2017 at 9:57 am

        Oh, this sounds so yummy! I want to try it! What protein powder do you use?

        1. Alex

          July 8, 2017 at 1:40 pm

          I just use a whey protein powder in vanilla!

  8. Kiara Giles

    June 22, 2017 at 8:06 pm

    This is so true! Very accurate. Thought it was cute and funny. Privacy is definitely a no go in my house. I can’t even potty or shower without my shadow knocking on the door. Lol. And I love the hide one. Very funny but very true. I get tired of sharing
    Thanks for this. I’ll be reading more.

    1. Alex

      June 22, 2017 at 8:12 pm

      Aw, I’m so glad you could relate- I feel like they’re things every parent experiences at some point! Thanks so much for reading! 🙂

  9. jessica

    June 22, 2017 at 8:22 pm

    I really loved this one. funny and so true. Especially the Hide!

  10. Holly

    June 23, 2017 at 8:39 am

    Hahaha- so true! Being a mom is awesome, but some days you just need to hide with a bag of oreos 🙂

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:39 pm

      definitely!!

  11. derralynmonahan

    June 23, 2017 at 9:43 am

    Great post!!! Love it

  12. Ambi

    June 23, 2017 at 11:01 am

    I really enjoyed this!!!! Lol …it’s so accurate. Parenting is by far the greatest thing I’ve ever been given the privilege to do, even with all the mishaps and sacrifices . Thanks for sharing !

  13. ekta jain

    June 23, 2017 at 11:26 am

    A great post howdy, I will forward this blog to my sisters, who are newly parents.

  14. Cheyenne

    June 23, 2017 at 12:57 pm

    Bribery has become my BFF. Love your list!

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:40 pm

      thank you! I never thought I would use bribery with my kids, but sometimes I just need an easy option!

  15. Brittany Ferrell

    June 23, 2017 at 6:25 pm

    Yup, I am totally guilty of eating nothing but the remains of Goldfish for lunch every day! You nailed it. My favorite is when they are “so hungry” but then you make them a delicious meal and they refuse to eat. I make all of our meals the exact same because for sure they want whatever you are having. Also, I laughed so hard at not having an agenda. Every day, you have a plan and then you get to the end of the day and say “So…maybe we’ll do that tomorrow!”

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:40 pm

      yes!! they definitely seem to know when to interrupt any plans that you have! so glad you were able to relate 🙂

  16. Keri

    June 24, 2017 at 5:03 am

    This is hilarious- every single time my husband sits down with food the kids flock him. We always joke about it.

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:36 pm

      It’s so crazy, they just have this sensor and know when to come steal your food! haha

  17. The Gifted Gabber

    June 24, 2017 at 8:46 am

    Iced coffee!! Haha! 😂 Seriously though, that tip is brilliant! Seems like you’ve been broken in pretty well in less than two years! – Amy

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:36 pm

      I think motherhood is an adapt or die world! haha

  18. Ashley

    June 24, 2017 at 10:59 am

    Hahaha the coffee tip is one I give to new teachers, too! Between the students and my toddler, yeah there’s not a lot of hot coffee in my life… 🙂

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:35 pm

      oh my gosh, I can’t even imagine with teaching on top of it!!

  19. Jordan | Read. Eat. Repeat.

    June 24, 2017 at 1:11 pm

    I especially relate to the food tips. I hide my food aaallll the time, ya’ll.

    1. Alex

      June 24, 2017 at 1:35 pm

      Yeeess, if I can’t eat it during his nap time it gets eaten behind the fridge! haha

  20. Natasha

    June 24, 2017 at 6:12 pm

    Great article, all the points are dead on, I also have a three year old and 5month old and live gets hectic real quick, but it’s good just to let things play out by itself

  21. Dedreanna

    June 26, 2017 at 5:18 am

    Lol yes! Iced coffee is my life.

  22. Melissa Javan

    June 28, 2017 at 12:11 am

    I can relate to all of these especially #2 and #3 LOL

  23. Nicolle

    June 28, 2017 at 10:27 pm

    Lol these are great and so true! My toddler is always trying to eat my food, even if what she has in front of her is the exact same thing! Drives me bonkers! Especially because I’m prego and want all my food!

  24. Jenna McMaster

    July 4, 2017 at 1:18 pm

    The coffee thing is the worst! No matter what my best efforts are, I never get to drink it hot!

    1. Alex

      July 4, 2017 at 8:02 pm

      Yea, I’ve had to give up! Buuuut, if I want to try, I now just put it in a thermos to start, even if I’m not going anywhere! Still usually ends up getting lukewarm but doesn’t pass into freezing cold! haha

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